Recently, I have been reading a lot of articles about random stuff. I read other peoples' blogs and then it gives me an idea for something to write about and then I forget about it... and then I remember when I am nowhere near a computer. =) Isn't that the way it goes?
I was reading a blog post by MckMama, who is a big-time blogger. She has a lot of followers and she just puts it all out there. I'm not quite there yet. I feel like it’s important to be honest, and I feel like I share a lot here, but I'm not ready to let everyone see the deepest, darkest corners of my mind. Maybe next week. =)
So I was reading her blog yesterday and she was talking about how we need to not be so protective over our children because we might be hurting them more than helping them. She talked about their development and things. She brought up a statistic for abduction, which is quite possibly my #1 fear for my children. They are so darn cute and I am just convinced that if I can't see them when we are in public, someone will snatch them up because they think they are so darn cute too! I know it's crazy, but I can't help it. She wrote that only about .0005% children are abducted by strangers. You can read about it HERE.
Okay, so my thought is this: It does happen. And .0005% is still too much of a chance for me. I can't even imagine what I would do. I think I would have a mental break down.
I have always liked to watch crime/detective shows, read about true crime, etc. Since becoming a parent, it is harder to watch and hear, because I start to see myself in that situation, or I see Jayna's face. I think more about it being Jayna because she is older, she is more verbal, and she's a girl. I know that boys can be abducted, but I worry because Jayna is just at that age that... well, you know. Anyway. It just worries me.
I'm weird. I always have been. okay, maybe not weird... strange... different, maybe. I can remember as a 12 or 13 year old playing through scenarios of if I were attacked, what would I do? What would I say? I still do it to this day. Even walking through my own house... when its dark, or if I'm alone..... I play it out in my mind, what an intruder might say or do and then what I would say or do. It probably wouldn't play out the way I think. I say that because every time Bonham steps from behind a corner or walks up behind me to try to scare me, he is successful. =) And every time, I jump back and scream. So, I'm not the best at thinking on my feet. Let's just hope that if there is ever an intruder, that Bonham is there to kick some major booty!
When Jayna was a tiny baby, Bonham and I went through all of the men in our family and we discussed how likely we thought that they were to ever hurt her. I think that was probably one of the more disturbing conversations Bonham and I have ever had. Have you ever asked yourself, 'Do I think that (fill in the name) would ever try to hurt my child?' As we went through the names, we didn't feel like any of the people in our family would ever do those kinds of things, but in most cases, it is a family member or friend and we wanted to address that. We were new parents and this little girl was our whole world. It makes me tear up just to type those words. We never want any harm to come to our children, but we can't be with them all the time. Our kids are too young for us to try to talk to them about 'good touch, bad touch'. This is probably just an awkward and uncomfortable post for you to read. But it’s what's on my mind. Why can't we talk about it? It’s a very real thing that happens to a lot of kids.
I also used to think as a younger woman that one reason I was never a target of abuse was because I was so verbal and outspoken. The majority of children who are victims of sexual assault are not as outgoing. Not that I feel I was ever around a lot of sexual predators (you never know for sure), but I think that maybe that would have deterred any of them. I have that same hope for Jayna.... that she is so outgoing and out spoken that she won't ever be a target of sexual abuse. There are times as a parent that you just want to say, 'Please stop talking'. We really try to let our kids be as vocal as they want. Not only because of the reasons mentioned above, but because that's who they are.... And I was always talkative - shocker! =)
Now that I have made my readers feel very uncomfortable.... I guess it's time to wrap up this post. My point is just that I want our kids to be adventurous and have experiences, but I want them to be safe too. There has to be a happy medium. Being a parent is hard. There are so many choices that we have to make so early on in their little lives and we just hope that we are doing it the right way the first time.
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